Come Visit Beautiful Fascist Arizona

June 12, 2011

Jan Brewer - Arizona's Governor

Arizona is a place where natural beauty, historic traditions, and modern conveniences combine to offer a fun medium-grade police state for people of all ages. Come visit Arizona this Father's Day; temporary entry permits are limited during the summer! - HRM Janice Brewer.

//Press Release//
//Ministry of Truth and Advertising//
//Arizona State Government//

Father’s Day: A Valleywide Guide to the Police State

sponsored by Corrections Corporation of America – We Know Fathers™ 

Mesa is well-known for its climate– perfect for serene and beautiful hiking adventures–, as well as its championship police brutality competitions. The community’s mix of entertaining activities (dancing requires a permit) and friendly (yet suspicious) residents makes visitors want to return again and again… (if you’re not arrested for a crime and held indefinitely.) Mayor doubles as a puppet for land developers and lobbyists (appointments and gloves available in City Hall, call (480) 644-2011).

Scottsdale might be known for having the largest and most prestigious mall in the southwest, but did you know Taser International calls this quaint bedroom community home? Taser Monthly says Scottsdale’s warm, summer nights and all-monkey police force make the “Most Livable City” an ideal nightspot for an electrifying, 100,000 volt adventure! Or, visit the Scottsdale City Kangaroo Court for a good laugh. (by alternate service invitation only, $0-$500).

Phoenix wouldn’t be complete without a tour of the Redflex headquarters just minutes north of the valley. Once a thriving example of surveillance-state technology, the company now offers donkey tours through its United States headquarters. Children’s activities include “My First Ticket,” an interactive game where your special little ones can mail out a real fake ticket! 23751 N 23rd Ave # 150
Phoenix, AZ 85085-1858, (480) 607-0705 (Ask for Shoba)

Pinal County comes through just in time for Father’s Day with Sheriff Babeu’s “Day With Daddy in Detention.” Iris, facial, finger/foot/dental prints, and DNA sequencing are all included in this free introduction to the county jail system. FREE – Funding provided by Homeland Security Grants.

Border Zone
checkpoints don’t have to be near a border, so please be compliant and complicit. Docile and harmless unless told where the border is, these agents helpfully find lost items in passing cars and provide general protection to the public in removing hazardous and “inactivated” foods (possession of organic, “raw,” or “bitch punk-ass food” is a capital offense in the Grand Canyon State (SB 1081, Bitch Punk-Ass Food Prohibition of 2011, (R)- Pearce, Mesa.)

Pima County
knows how to take force too far. This county executes good fathers with bad warrants. Blood-curling shootings always in season, enough to make an avid fascist sick, for discerning authoritarian psychopaths only (or current office-holders).


All They Want To Do Is Take Your Money… and Car!

July 8, 2010

Our favorite Redflex/Arizona Republic corp-media hybrid drone (“reporter”) Michael Ferraresi covers the City of Phoenix’s new scheme to use intrusive license plate recognition in combination with watch lists of those suspected of not paying parking tickets, court fees, or whatever else the city can make up as they go along.

Court officials said the cameras could provide the most efficient way to

Hayley Adamson, 16, was killed by a police officer driving 94 MPH responding to a false ALPR hit.

collect unpaid parking tickets, rather than spending money on expensive legal action in court. “This is all uncollected revenue for the city,” said Dianna Noli-Hill, the Phoenix Municipal Court administrator working with police on the pilot program.

What could possibly go wrong? After all, who needs due process (“expensive legal action in court”) when you can just steal private property and hold it for ransom.

Phoenix Halts Scam-Van Expansion

October 8, 2008

From the Arizona Republic:

Phoenix won’t be expanding its red-light camera photo-enforcement program – at least not for now.

A summer pilot speed program, which focused on higher speeds on arterial streets outside of school zones, and right turns on red lights, had mixed results.

The Speed Van Pilot Program didn’t produce significant numbers of violations to support changing the contract with vendor American Traffic Solutions, according to staff reports.

Oh, the humanity! It’s almost as the City is disappointed to learn that additional photo enforcement is unnecessary.

When in doubt (or, in need of additional money), create new laws or expand existing ones to cause more people to fall into the violation category.

Take a hint from Scottsdale, which put ATS’ Josh Weiss on their city transportation commission, only to (surprise!) lobby for the expansion of laws that could be enforced via camera.

Some call it “one hand washes the other.”

We call it FRAUD.

%d bloggers like this: