“Close the box!”
An award-winning level of drama played out recently as those words were bellowed by an American Traffic Solutions employee to a fellow co-worker as a CameraFRAUD volunteer was spotted watching the watchers. The newly-found sense of urgency is in sharp contrast to last month, when it was discovered that ATS left an automated ticketing machine open to tampering and modification for over a week.
The vociferation was reminiscent of other powerfully emotional moments in film, such as “Stella!” from the 1951 classic: “A Streetcar Named Desire,” or more recently the memorable quote of “this is Sparta!” from 300.
After startling his female companion, the well-winded worker double-checked the photo radar enclosure to ensure it was locked, then proceeding to illegally back his Ford Ranger into traffic during lunch hour on busy Shea Blvd. (Oh, and then failed to signal a right turn.)
“We believe that installing special [photo enforcement] cameras to cite our own employee’s bad driving is an unprecedented source of new revenue,” remarked Josh Weiss (spokesdrone for ATS) in a non-existent interview with CameraFRAUD.com. “Statistics show that our executive team, including CEO James Tuton, could provide the bulk of this new money. God, I hate that guy…”